Deep in the woods by Crystal Lake,
There's a guy who loves to bake,
Not cookies or pies, no way, no how,
He's got a hockey mask and a furrowed brow.
Jason Voorhees, slicing through the trees,
Making campfire stories more than just a tease,
He's got a machete, but he's misunderstood,
Just a mama's boy chopping firewood.
Teenagers scream and run in fright,
But Jason’s just looking for a friend tonight,
He’s socially awkward, can’t you see?
It’s hard to chat when you’re undead and freaky.
Jason Voorhees, slicing through the trees,
Making campfire stories more than just a tease,
He's got a machete, but he's misunderstood,
Just a mama's boy chopping firewood.
Every Friday night, it’s the same old spree,
But he’s got dreams of tranquility,
A cabin in the woods, a peaceful retreat,
Maybe knitting sweaters, wouldn't that be sweet?
He’s got a heart, though it’s on ice,
He’d love to play Scrabble if you’d be nice,
So next time you see him, don’t run away,
Maybe Jason just wants to play.
Jason Voorhees, slicing through the trees,
Making campfire stories more than just a tease,
He's got a machete, but he's misunderstood,
Just a mama's boy chopping firewood.
In the end, he's just a misunderstood guy,
With a hockey mask and a piercing eye,
If you see him coming, don’t scream and shout,
Just give him a hug, and he might chill out.